Driving home the other night I witnessed a hilarious and simultaneously alarming instance of road rage. Cut up by another driver, I watched an aggrieved motorist get out of his car and beat the bonnet* of his persecutor’s car with his hat, whilst roaring his displeasure. A very ‘Basil Fawlty’ moment – spleen was vented but not a lot else was accomplished.
This reminded me about the value of the pause – the ability to stop, take stock and choose our response to a given situation – response-ability if you like. Instead of operating on ‘automatic pilot’ triggered by an event or situation we can engage the rational part of our mind long enough to make a more considered response. We may still choose to beat the bonnet but at least we are choosing not reacting.
- Pause and ask yourself:
- What is happening right now?
- What do I want right now?
- What am I doing right now to stop me getting what I want?
- Make a choice.
- Take a breath ….. move on
** Senge, P. et al (1994) The fifth discipline fieldbook, London: Nicholas Brearley Publishing Ltd, pp216-8.