Fascinating conversation this morning about our relationship with feedback.
I was talking to George, a newly appointed sales coach, who had been on something of a roller-coaster of self-discovery and we were talking about his journey from loathing feedback to loving it.. well at least being more acceptant of it.
“Every time I went into the boss’s office I’d be expecting a rollicking so I’d put on my armour plating and anything he said would just ping off me”. For George, the relationship with his boss was too similar to his relationship with his headmaster and it came as a bit of revelation that he might be transferring the associations and feelings of this old relationship onto his relationship with his boss. “I was going in there expecting to be ‘told off’ and made to feel like a schoolboy again – actually, when I opened up a bit, my boss had some really useful things to say, and even the critical bits didn’t smart too much”.
While George had make great strides to opening up to feedback he still felt there would always be a bit of him that he would need to protect “It’s a bit like string vest now – there are holes to let the arrows through, but I am still covered up”.
So how do you receive feedback – armour plated or string vest?